LFFL [2022]: Week 5 Results

I must say, I didn’t see much of the early games this week. Who schedules a kid’s birthday party for 10 am on a Sunday in October? At a Gymboree…with no TV’s? #AndSoItBegins I do know that bye weeks start in WK06, and if you DIDN’T know that, shame on you.

Gid’s Kids def. Dust Devils, 180.5-126.0

I must say, who needs Kittle? Who needs Pittman? Not the Kids, who put up a franchise record 180.5 pts and ride high on this week’s Bullet Tain. Josh Allen is ruining all my Kirk Cousins props.

Key Observation: I thought the Devils were going to go three weeks in a row getting zero points out of a player and still win…not to be.

Big Hitter def. H.Y.C., 179.4-110.4

I must say, I do like the Andy Reid State Farm commercial. It’s less sickening than the ARod ones. Big Hitter steamrolls.

Key Observation: GDavis on the bench with 32.1…wouldn’t have mattered. Apparently ESPN thinks H.Y.C. needs a Snickers bar.

4th and 20 def. Donnie Barqs, 154.5-126.4

I must say, I don’t know what to think of the NE running game, but it worked on Sunday. And the Lions…are still the Lions.

Key Observation: I have heard that the failed Jeopardy host consumed a lot of bangers and mash on his trip to England. Nice game.

AZ TRiM Shop def. Motor City Dan Campbell, 110.1-95.9

I must say, it would be my worst nightmare if my fantasy game came down to the the two kickers, which is what happened in this matchup on SNF. The 🐐 > Mighty Mac. TRiM hang on.

Key Observation: A bit of bad luck that Teddy covers got hurt on the first play. MIA D torched by the ✈️. No worries, DHop to the rescue…in 2 weeks.

Klaver Football Club def. Straight Cash Homie, 149.9-73.2

I must say, this Geno Smith kid can play. How have we all missed this all these years? KFC win by 78.7 pts.

Key Observation: I am a Russ Wilson fan. This is painful to watch.

GMNY United def. The Monsoon, 131.2-113.2

I must say, that was an excellently refereed game in TB on Sunday. That is all.

Key Observation: Suzan Pitt > Kyle Pitts. [Look it up louses]

CRAPPIE REPORT: Straight Cash Homie

The only team not to score 95.9 pts this week; I can’t confirm, but it could be the first time we have had two players with 0.0 pts in a starting lineup. Three players with a total of 1.1 pts.

Key Observation: That creep Taysom freakin Hill is available. 🔪 💀

Week 6

Klaver Football Club v. Big Hitter

These two heavyweights square off with KC heavy Big Hitter facing the BUF D and league wunderkid Geno Smith facing the Cardinals. Exciting!


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